12 Louds of Christmas
by Exotos135
Summary: Lincoln and his sisters go on a wild goose chase for items related to the "12 Days of Christmas" song.


_At the Loud House's Living Room..._

The day before Christmas. Next to Black Friday, this was one of the most important nights for the Louds, after all, what else would you expect from the day before one of the biggest holidays known to man? This time, however, the Louds weren't doing anything special for the holiday: They were dressed for the snowy weather, yes, but they weren't doing anything else.

Luckily, Lincoln had a way to fix that.

"Attention, sisters!" Lincoln exclaimed, catching his sisters' attention. "I have with me the best wild goose chase we're going to have! Do you know the song The Twelve Days of Christmas?"

The sisters nodded. "Well then, this is what we're going to do: everybody gets a piece of the objects mentioned in the song, and has to go get them and bring them back here before the end of the day."

"What is there for us if any of us win?" Lori asked, crossing her arms.

"According to mom and dad, we'll win a trip to the north pole!" Lincoln answered, and the sisters immediately got in line to get their items. "Lori, get 6 geese, Leni, get 5 golden rings, Luna, get 4 calling birds, Luan, get 8 milkmaids, Lynn, get three French hens, Lucy, get 9 ladies dancing, Lola and Lana, you two will get two turtle doves, Lisa, get a partridge in a pear tree, and I'll go get 7 swans."

Lincoln handed each of his present sisters a piece of paper saying what they needed to get, and Lori soon said, "Wait, aren't those only 9 of the things mentioned in the song?"

"Well, we're only 11, so I had to cut some items out, and Lily is too young, so I had to cut another thing out," Lincoln explained. "Point is, this is what we get, and we gotta get these things before the end of the day, got it?"

The sisters nodded.

"Then let's go hunt for these things!" Lincoln exclaimed, raising his fist.

The sisters raised their fists and exclaimed "Yeah!" in unison before bolting out of the house... only for Lisa to return immediately and go upstairs.

 _With Lincoln..._

The boy went to the park and then to the nearest pond available. "Okay, 7 swans, I just need to find enough swans in the pond and go back home with them!" Lincoln said as he looked at his piece of paper, then turned to the body of water. "Now where are the swans?"

Luckily for him, there were more than enough swans swimming in the pond. They seemed pretty peaceful, too. "Great, just what I needed!" Lincoln said before taking out a loaf of bread. "Now to get some of these birds to come with me!"

Once the swans saw the piece of bread Lincoln held, they immediately flew to Lincoln and-without warning-attacked him with their beaks and wings until they stole the bread. They promptly returned to the pond as Lincoln got back up, dusted himself and yelled, "Hey, you could at least thank me for the bread!"

But the swans ignored him. Clearly, Lincoln couldn't take these birds lightly.

"This is going to be harder than I thought," Linc said, narrowing his eyes in determination.

 _With Lisa..._

The small genius sat in front of a computer, where searched for partridge information. "What is this partridge the song mentions?" she asked, right before turning to the reader and saying, "Hey, I'm a scientist, not a birdologist."

What she found, however, definitely soured her mood.

"Partridges are non-migratory birds who are primarily found in the old world, also known as Europe, Asia, and Africa?! What?!" Lisa exclaimed. "How am I supposed to get one of those in a pear tree, and how am I supposed to find and bring a pear tree at all? That song is too darn specific for my liking!"

The little genius groaned and crossed her arms. "Now what am I supposed to do?" she inquired.

And then she realized something: Lincoln never said they had to bring the real objects, just to bring them. So, remembering the old technique of crafting, Lisa smiled as she got an idea. A devious idea.

 _Meanwhile, with Lori..._

The teenager read her piece of paper as she approached a geese farm. "Okay, 6 geese, this place should literally have more than enough geese for that," Lori remarked, saving her paper on her pockets.

And once she entered the farm, the first thing she saw was a group of 6 geese placed inside a fence. "I Literally called it!" Lori exclaimed, raising her fist victoriously before heading for the farmer. "Hey, old man! How much for the geese?"

"I'm sorry, girl, but I'm afraid I can't just sell you my geese like it was nothing," the farmer answered. "If you want to get the geese, you gotta catch them: If you catch a geese, I'll put it in a cage to sell it for you, with the addition of 10 dollars per geese you take."

Lori quickly searched her wallet, and found that she did have enough money to pay for the geese. "Alright, I'll do it!" Lori stated. "It can't be that hard to catch a bunch of dumb birds anyway."

The teenager walked to the fence, got in it and started to chase after the birds. Unfortunately, the geese proved to be far more difficult to catch than she previously thought, for they flew away, dodged her attempts, or downright dodged and then struck her with their beaks, with the girl no closer to catching any geese than she was at the beginning.

"Get back here, you avian rats!" Lori snapped, chasing after the birds.

 _And then, with Luna..._

The rocker went to a nearby rock music shop and went to a laptop. "4 calling birds sounds like a nice band name, I'll see if I can find any bands with that name," she remarked, and to her surprise, there was only one band with such a name. "Alright, it says here that "4 Calling Birds" was a band that Mick Swagger used to play for before making it big. The band was disbanded shortly after he made it big."

"I'm afraid that's true."

Luna turned around and saw Mick Swagger was right next to her, in his same disguise as before. The girl was awestruck. "I honestly thought that band had been forgotten in time, but if you looked it up, then you must need it for something."

"My bro sent me on a search for objects from the song the twelve days of christmas, and I got 4 calling birds-" Luna explained.

"And you want to bring the rest of the band with you?" Mick asked, earning a nod from Luna. "Perhaps, we could put on another show just for fun. Would you like to help me go look for the rest?"

Mick extended his hand towards her, and gaining a wide, joyful smile, Luna shook hands with the musician and went looking for the rest of the band together.

 _And now, Luan with the weather..._

"Hey, birds, how's the weather up there?" Luan asked to some birds flying, only to cringe almost immediately. "Oh geez, even I found that joke terrible. Anyway, 8 milkmaids, I should be able to gather those... but first I need to figure out what the heck a milkmaid is."

And then, she saw a group of women dressed as milkmaids walking to somewhere. "Maybe I should ask those ladies," Luan went to the group and said, "Hey, do you know what a milkmaid is?"

"Well, yeah, it's the term used for ladies who milked cows," said the leader milkmaid. "In fact, that's what we're dressed as at the moment!"

"Interesting," Luan soon got an idea. "Would you, perhaps, like to follow me somewhere?"

The group exchanged looks.

 _And now Leni..._

The fashionista walked around the mall, taking a look at the stores as she-miraculously-actually remembered what she was looking for. "Alright, Leni, don't mess this up! You have to get the best golden rings available!" she thought to herself in determination.

And then she saw a pair of shiny shoes in a shoe store. "Oh, but first I gotta a look at those shoes!" and then she saw a pair of golden leggings. "And maybe those leggings too!"

Oh geez.

 _With the twins..._

Lola and Lana walked across the snow-covered streets as they looked for a pair of turtle doves for their part of the hunt.

"Okay, so we were tasked to find turtle doves, right?" Lana started, earning a nod from Lola. "Maybe we should have asked Lincoln what a turtle dove was in the first place. I mean, I have never heard of such an animal before, have you?"

"Not in the slightest, but I do get an idea of how they look," the diva replied. "But what do you think, sis?"

"I think of Doves with the impenetrable shield of a turtle, with six wings to carry their massive weight, and large teeth under their beak!" Lana answered with a lot of excitement. "What about you, Lola?"

"All I can think of is a white turtle with bird wings," Lola answered, sounding honest for once.

"Lame!" Lana exclaimed, smacking her sister in the head.

Suddenly, the twins came across a peculiar sight: a pet shop with both doves and turtles available. Seeing that, the twins exchanged looks and clasped their hands as they shared mischivieous smiles...

 _Speaking of duos..._

Lynn and Lucy decided to go together to get their items, with Lynn having her arm wrapped around Lucy's shoulder. The poet's neutral look, however, made it difficult to see if she enjoyed it or not.

"Alright, 3 French hens for me and 9 ladies dancing for you, if we work together, we'll get them in no time!" Lynn stated. "By the way, do you know an easy way to get to France and back? I gotta get those hens somehow!"

"I believe that French hen is simply a name for a species of chicken, not an actual hen from France," Lucy remarked. "Why don't you go look for some of them in a farm? I'll go to a dance studio to find my dancing ladies."

And then, the duo saw from afar both a farm-with Lori still chasing after geese in it-and a dance studio. "Race to the locations! 3, 2, 1, go!" Lynn exclaimed.

Then the athlete pushed Lucy back and ran as fast as she could to the farm, while Lucy put on a smile and ran for the dance studio.

 _Back with Lisa..._

The little genius chuckled to herself as she searched around the stuff in the attic, throwing away anything she didn't need.

"They told me it would never be used, they told me it simply wouldn't make the cut, but now, the time has come to prove them wrong!" Lisa dramatically stated right before she found what she was looking for. "Behold!"

The girl took out a robotic replica of a partridge in a pear tree. "Patridge-on-a-pear-tree-bot!" Lisa exclaimed. "My very first Christmas-related invention, and the only one so far that hasn't been destroyed to prevent it from ruining the holidays! It's time to show everybody how wrong they were at calling this invention unnecessary!"

Then she went to the backyard, put the robotic thingamajig on the ground and rested behind a tree. "Now to wait for everybody else to return to rub my victory in their faces!" Lisa said.

So she started waiting... and waiting... and waiting...

"I really wish I had brought something to entertain me in the meantime," said the little genius.

 _And with Luna and Luan..._

The rocker and the comedian walked their own separate ways-Luna having Mick and the remaining members of 4 Calling Birds and Luan having the whole milkmaid group by her side-until they accidentally came across each other and stopped right on their tracks.

"Luna?" Luan asked.

"Luan?" Luna inquired in return. "What are you doing? Where are you going with those milkmaids?"

"I'm taking them back to the backyard so they can sing with us," Luan answered.

"Um, no, Mick Swagger and the 4 Calling Birds are going to sing with us!" Luna hissed back.

"Now, girls, we don't need to get violent-" Mick remarked, trying to calm down the duo.

"Yeah, how about we settle it down like real teenagers?" Luna suggested, only to quickly change her mind when she realized what that meant. "Actually, let's just race back to the backyard, whoever gets there first gets their groups to sing with us!"

"Deal!" Luan retorted.

And as the teens ran back as fast as they could, the groups just groaned as they followed them.

 _Back with Leni..._

The teenager came out of the mall wearing all sorts of shiny objects: tiaras, dresses, boots, you name it, she was probably wearing a shiny version of it. However, among the shiny things, she didn't have any golden rings with her.

"Oh right, I was supposed to, like, get 5 golden rings for the chase stuff," Leni said, right before she remembered something. "Oh wait, I probably have some of them back at home! My spare Ringies! Man, I hope everybody else is, like, having an easier time than me."

 _Back at the farm..._

Lori once again leaped straight for a goose, trying to catch it to take it back home, but the bird simply dodge her and flew to the corner of the fence. Sadly, she was having an easier time compared to Leni, since she at least focused on what she was trying to get.

"Alright, listen up, you avian rats!" Lori stated as she got up and dusted herself. "I'm not going to stand for your nonsense any longer, so you better line up and-"

And then a French hen got on top of Lori's head and jumped off. "What the-"

And then Lynn came out of nowhere and tackled Lori. "Lynn, what are you doing here?!" Lori complained as she shook off the athlete.

"I came here to get some French hens, and according to the farmer, I gotta catch them first!" the tomboy answered.

Suddenly, swans came flying by, followed by Lincoln dropping on top of Lynn and Lori. "Oh hi girls, how are you doing?" Linc asked nonchalantly. "Me, I'm chasing after these annoying swans!"

"Wait, we're all having trouble with avian annoyances, right?" Lori asked, and Lynn and Lincoln nodded in unison. "How about we work together to deal with them?"

And then the trio turned to look at the swans, hens and geese, who just... stood in place. Then, the three siblings got up, dusted themselves and cracked their knuckles while flashing determined grins.

 _And with Lana and Lola..._

Lola walked around her sisters to hide what she was doing, and once she finished, she stopped moving and saw what she did: she basically glued a pair of doves on top of a pair of turtles.

"Lola, I present to you the turtle doves!" Lana stated with joy and pride. "Now let's go back home and get our prize!"

Suddenly, Luna and Luan ran past them, and once the duo saw the 4 Calling Birds and milkmaids following behind, they ran as fast as they could back home."

 _And eventually..._

Lincoln, Lori and Lynn-looking quite bruised-managed to catch and pay for their geese and hens, with the swans being given as a free gift. So, with that done, the three headed back to the backyard as fast as they could, and encountered the race between Luna, Luan, Lana and Lola in the process, which made them run even faster. However, once they all reached the backyard, they saw something shocking.

Leni was playing chess with Lisa... and was apparently oblivious to the fact she was losing. And then the duo saw their siblings.

"Oh hi guys, when did you get here?" Leni asked innocently.

"We could ask you the same thing!" Lori exclaimed. "When did you arrive?!"

"A little while ago, actually. I hitched a ride with Bobby!" Leni innocently answerd, earning a murderous glare from Lori in response. "H-He offered to take me home, nothing else!"

"Wait, we all got our items, so who gets to go on the north pole trip?" Lana asked.

The girls immediately turned to Lincoln, who dropped his swans with worry. "Wait a minute, there's no trip to the north pole, is it?" Lori guessed as the sisters narrowed their eyes and surrounded Lincoln. "You just made that up in order to have us go all around the city, collecting all this random nonsense, didn't you?!"

"Uh..." Lincoln twiddled his fingers.

"You better have a darn good reward to give us, Lincoln!" Lynn hissed, grabbing Lincoln's shirt and pulling him closer to her. "You're not going to get away with using us for-"

"What's going on here?"

The siblings turned around and saw Lynn Sr. and Rita, their parents, standing nearby with arms crossed. "Great, now I'm wondering from who I inherited my ability to go unnoticed," Lucy remarked.

"Lincoln made us go through a bunch of trouble for these things!" Lori complained as she and the sisters revealed the objects they gathered for the hunt.

The adults hummed to themselves. "You know, we could do something about these items..." Rita remarked.

The siblings exchanged confused looks.

 _A bit later..._

It was nighttime, and the town square was decorated by robotic replicas of the objects the siblings brought, with the Louds watching as the townspeople looked at the decorations with surprise. "Why are we using replicas Lisa made?" Leni asked.

"Because we can't really use the items you got since, you know, they're all living beings," Lynn Sr. explained.

"Well, we did something with the items at least," Lori said before turning to Lincoln with an angry look. "But Lincoln literally still owes us a reward for what he made us go through!"

All the sisters promptly turned to Lincoln, equally angry and hoping he would at least give them a reward. "I guess I could give you some money?" Lincoln remarked as he took out his wallet.

Once he opened the thing, though, a single butterfly came out, which caught Leni and Lana's attention. "Butterfly!" the girls shouted in unison before chasing after the animal.

"Okay, so, I don't have any money with me right now," Lincoln said nervously as the remaining sisters looked at him. "I know, let's look in the attic!"

 _At the attic..._

Lincoln searched through the boxes for something to give his sisters, who were watching him nearby. He threw out various things: A harmonica taken by Luan, a jewelry case taken by Lola, a banjo taken by Luna, a vampire costume taken by Lucy and a book of quantum jokes for Lisa... for some reason. By the time he finished searching, most of the sisters had already left except for Lori.

"Where did everybody go?" Lincoln asked.

"They took what you threw out and left," Lori answered, her look growing angrier as she said, "And now, It's my turn to get a gift."

"Well, uh, I'm kinda out of things to give," Lincoln shrugged with a nervous smile. "Although, there is something I could give you."

Lori raised an eyebrow as Lincoln took out a familiar object: The first toy phone he ever got. "Mom and dad gave it to me while I was a kid, and when they gave me an actual phone, they told me they saved it here just in case they'd need it again," Lincoln somberly explained.

"Wait, that's my toy phone," Lori said as she took the toy and gave it a closer look. "I remember using it back when I was a kid."

The duo exchanged surprised looks, and as they exchanged smiles, Lori decided to return the toy phone to the boy. "Keep it, think of it as a hand-me-down of sorts," the teenager said. "Besides, I have literally a far superior phone at my disposal anyway."

Her smug and proud tone changed when Lincoln suddenly hugged her, and once the shock wore off, Lori gladly returned the hug.


End file.
